Let's think of some fun product pitchmen/women.
Ben Bernake for Just for Men (we were just saying it looks like he colors his hair): "When I am not fighting inflation... I am fighting gray hairs!"
Bill Gross of Pimco Total Return Fund fame for Total brand cereal: (say this w/ a Mrs. Garrett voice) It would take 4 years for me to short enough U.S. Treasuries to equal the nutrition in one bowl of Total cereal! Then we would be broke El Erian! BROKE!!!
Katy Perry for Double Mint Gum: "I am a terrible singer but I have huge Double D boobs... chewing Double Mint Gum keeps me from the singing part!"
Tom Brady for Ugs: "Seriously... I am rich, play football, and have a smoking hot wife (and ex!). I can pitch whatever the f*** I want!"
Madonna for Pampers: "All of my stolen, er, I mean adopted kids wear Pampers. I think, I don't really know, the nanny takes care of that stuff when I am out w/ my 17 yr old boyfriend who is most likely blind in at least one eye."
Hulk Hogan for Zubaz pants: "Oh yeah brother... when I am dropping the big leg on Roddy Piper, I need some big pants. Zubaz!"
Barrack Obama for Nicorotte: "Look, I need a f*ing cigarette right now! Do you have any idea how f*ing stressful this job is?! I killed Bin Laden and I am still getting shit for the damn economy!! Ok, just give me a few pieces of that damned gum while I do the State of the Union."
Lindsay Lohan for Craftsman Tools: "When I want a night out these days... I need a special set of tools to get that pesky tracking bracelet off." Craftsman tools and 13 flirtinis... presto, another terrific Tuesday evening!"
Lady Gaga for Brawny paper towels: "Heck, I have made a shit ton of mistakes... Brawney really cleans 'em up!"
The Ultimate Warrior for Prozac: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQgZ7HLZLv8
No comments:
Post a Comment