Jay About Bistro de Margot (and Wilco)

It was a big double date this past Tuesday w/ my special lady and LB squared. Tuesday is a tough night but we were committed! First stop was the newish Bistro de Margot. This used to be L'Amante and had become such a go to spot for a decent date or work dinner the new French iteration had some wood to chop. We were a little worried when we popped in as the place was pretty empty at 6:30pm. As the evening wore on they did fill up but unlike L'Amante it was an older crowd who gravitated to the dining room as opposed to the bar. The space was nice but we agreed they could stand to turn the lights down just a bit. The service was solid w/ the added touch of a table visit from the chef which always goes a long way. We were started w/ an Amuse Bouche of cold shrimp in a sauce of lobster, Pernod, and brandy. It was ok, not great. Sauce sounded good but was a little thin and the shrimp seemed a little old. The bread was plain old O Bread and was also nothing special. As we got into the meal things picked up. My Carrot ginger soup was silky and carried nice fresh garden flavor. My main course of seared duck breast was also delicious. The duck was medium rare indeed but the flavor was nice and the bird was quite tender. The reduction was also very flavorful and the side veggies were perfectly cooked. My lady had the sea trout which was also well cooked and very fresh and flavorful. The meal was good. It is definitely a bigger experience as there seemed to be apps or big plates w/ very few light dinner options. So it is a very nice date or somebody else is paying work dinner, maybe take your folks if they are in town kind of place. I did have a solid cocktail and the wine list was nothing special but the bottle we had was taken down in short order. 1.5 thumbs up.

After dinner we made a quick stop into Vin next door. They had a wine tasting class finishing up otherwise there was only 1 other patron while we were there. Not much else to say as we ordered straight forward stuff. Well stocked bar, with a nice wine list and not enough beers. It is a nice space but an off the run location which will be tough to maintain...

The concert was our last stop. LB sent me a review from a die hard fan and it was amusing. It should be noted that the concert was at the Flynn Theater. I enjoy seeing shows there but it is certainly more conducive to seeing a jazz or small acoustic set versus say a large arena rock show. You have a seat and while the nearly 100% white preppy middle aged crowd stood... there was not much dancing and it is not really encouraged by the staff. Beer is also cut off early and not allowed in the concert hall itself. That said, after a meandering tune up w/ the new album Star Wars the band got into its back catalog and really turned it up w/ such faves as Handshake Drugs, Heavy Metal Drummer, and I'm the Man Who Loves You. They did a far out encore of Spiders then went acoustic for a fun long second encore where the band was very tight and hit some high notes. The review we read said the energy seemed lacking and Tweedy may have been a bit irritated or something but other than maybe not being psyched about playing a couple heavily (on the web) requested slow songs I took his attitude to be more bemused than anything. I have seen these guys a few times and always enjoy the experience. This was no different. Fun time.  http://wilcoworld.net/#!/

Overall 2 thumbs up (added points for getting out mid week)!

Hello Old Friend

My kids are not worldly. To be fair they are only 3 and taking them places is a gamble in the best of times due to their unbridled energy. They loved Archie's when it was in the old location (now a Dunkin Donuts) in Shelburne. When it closed they couldn't understand the whole situation and felt really bad that Archie was sick. When the sign came up that Archie's would reopen in a new location just across the street they were pumped! To be fair my lady and I were enthused as well. Archie's had been a family friendly place that served delicious burgers at a reasonable price and without pretension. So how is the new spot? Well, Archie himself is just consulting in order to get a couple newbies up and running in the spirit of the original. We popped over last week after school at like 5pm on a Wednesday. Totally packed with a line to the door. Uh, no thank you. I was tooling around yesterday (MLK Day) around noon and looking for a place to take my kids solo where people might not mind how poorly they were behaving. Seriously, it was ugly for a bit in the morning. Hey, how about new Archie's? It was open and looked not as busy. We cruised in and it was perfect. There were a few families and some guys taking a break from work. We got in ordered and got a booth out of the way. The scene is similar and the space is really not much bigger than the old one, although the kitchen looks larger and that seems to be reflected in a more expansive menu. So how was the food? OK. The burger was a little smaller and a tad overcooked. The fries were crispy and good and the chips actually were fresher than they had been at the end of old Archie's run. There are a couple more local beers on tap which is nice. Prices were still reasonable. Overall it was a good experience and I am pretty happy to have them back. Can the new iteration reach the old one's lofty peak? Not sure but it remains one of the most reliable family joints in Shelburne so that holds some value.

BTW, we got done music class Sunday at 5pm and headed for some chow at Pho Hong in the North End of Burlington. pretty busy (at 5pm?!) and closing. Winter hours, they close at 5?! Who the f*** stays open all afternoon then closes just before dinner? Ok, f* it! We went over to Bluebird BBQ. Great place for kids. 1 hour wait. WTF?!?!?! At 5PM on a Sunday? The parking lot was only half full? Next stop, Tiny Thai. Line out the door. Shit, this was getty serious and the kids were getting impatient. Finally, Misery Loves Company. Boom! They had 3 kids of chicken which were all delicious, the fried chicken w/ honey butter was sick. $5 Heady Toppers and a DJ spinning at a reasonable volume? It was great. MLC does it again!

Oh yeah, GO PATS!!!

1... BILLION DOLLARS!!!!!

Muahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!

Marry New Year!!

Beef Jerky Time!  Well, this is some kind of f*d up way to start a year, huh? Stock market in the shitter, China's economy even worse, North Korea claiming to be testing an H-Bomb, Iran and Saudi Arabia battling, and that is on top of all the crazy stuff we already had going on?!

On the bright side, I have been cleaning up vomit for the last 24 hours, including a projectile that got all over me and the couch. It is really hard to clean puke. It gets everywhere and smells really bad. It is so gross in fact that when I got poop on my hand while trying to help my other kid wipe her tush it really seemed like no big deal?! My little girl weighs about 29 pounds and seriously her poops are bigger than mine. I am sure I have mentioned that before but it still blows my mine. She is also a champ getting potty trained at the moment. My son gives 0 F***s. Maybe even less than 0. If you could find someone more enthusiastic about the world I will give you $10 though. Poop, pee, and puke... the three P's that are currently ruling my tiny world.

Speaking of giant steamy turds, Donald Trump is visiting Burlington, VT tonight. The event starts at 7PM but the first person in line showed up at 4:30AM and when we cruised by around 2PM there was a line around the block. The Flynn Theater seats 1400 people, there have been 20,00 tickets released and we heard a guy in the line say he just logged on and tix were still outstanding. Nothing could go wrong there right? I spoke to a relatively intelligent guy I know (full disclosure, he is from the South), and he said Trump is tapping into the National conscience, he is saying what everyone is really thinking but afraid to say. That is a terrifying thought. I certainly am a believer that we are too politically correct and people are afraid to have difficult conversations on current topics but keeping all Muslims out of the country or building a wall between us and Mexico, and some of the other nonsense? Crazy talk. Of course the real comedy is that if it comes down to Trump and say Bernie Sanders it is not a slam dunk either way. How have we gotten here? Every election I say, this is the worst it has ever been. 2 GW Bush wins? He was a train wreck. Obama had hope but not much else and while he has gotten some good things done it has been a shaky presidential run. But who did he run against? Mitt Romney? That guy sucked but looks like a white knight compared to this current shit bag of crazy. Cruz and Rubio don't believe in science. Jeb Bush hands out baby turtles to remind people how he turtled once the race began. Chris Christie is fat. Fiornia can't run a food truck. Ben Carson is like Dr Nick on the Simpsons. Hillary can't stop lying and playing into the crazy lady narrative. Bernie doesn't buy into Capitalism... which only happens to be one of the central cornerstones upon which we built this country. And then you have the Donald. A huge blustery horse's ass. I suppose when you live in a place where some talentless f*sticks like the Kardasians dominate every news outlet in the country on a daily basis this is what you should expect?

1 quick review. The Little Garden Market in Charlotte gets fresh oysters for Christmas Eve and New Year's Eve. I always think about it and this year ordered some. The owner is a super friendly guy. He shucked 'em, wrapped them for transport and gave me some house made Mignonette sauce. The oysters were delicious, fresh, a little briny but not too stank. It was a nice little treat. If you like oysters and live in the area maybe give your holiday a little boost next year.

OK, one more... I liked the new Star Wars movie. I liked the pace, I liked the story, it was a fun movie. Is it as good as Empire? No, nothing is or probably ever will be so if you set your bar at a reasonable level it is a pleasant way to spend a couple hours.

Ok, time to go see what weird body excretion awaits me at home!

Jay About Stowe

Hey, what do you know... we ditched the kids w/ my folks and made a run for it! Well, we actually cruised down to Stowe for an evening of revelry to celebrate the big 40 for our pal LB. So where to start? First off, it was about 35 degrees and snow/sleeting as we drove south. WTF?! It is mid October? I need to move south. Then I remember we may soon be in the clutches of our new president Bernie/Trump and I remember that my next move may be north... like to Canada. Anywho, we stopped in Richmond for a bite to eat. Wanting to go light we stopped at Sweet Simone's in Richmond. That place is pretty solid. We grabbed a slice of cold flatbread and a huge bowl of autumn soup followed by a lemon meringue cupcake. The soup was hot and had a nice squash flavor w/ toasted pumpkin seeds which added nice texture. The flatbread had goat cheese and sundried tomatoes if I correctly recalled and was pretty good. The piece de resistance was the cupcake. The cake was almost like a corn muffin but moist and sweet w/ a lemon custard inside and covered by a meringue that was slightly caramelized and while not bracingly sweet it was delicious. We have tended to find the sweets are the way to go (coffee is nice too), they are all fantastic. The savory stuff is ok but you can go elsewhere for that. It was now solidly snowing.

Further south we checked into the Mountain Road Resort. Driving up it looks like a motor lodge (but the location is decent right next to the Harvest Market. The main lobby was a welcome surprise... bright, modern with clean lines and well thought out, modern furniture and fixtures. They offered a friendly greeting along w/ cookies and coffee or tea. Our room was spacious and also redone in a contemporary style. It was really more than adequate. As for unexpected amenities, they have a large indoor pool w/ sauna, lounge, and not working hot tub. It was a great area to chill out. 2 fellow guests were doing just that... and shot us terribly go the f*** away glares when we stopped in to also chill. Well, screw them. We hit the outdoor hot tub and relaxed. 1 3/8 thumbs up mostly quality for the price.

After we were appropriately loosened up we headed for dinner at Doc Ponds. This place is the casual stepchild of the Hen of the Wood mini empire and I think they nailed it. We ate everything so I won't take too much time here but the food is unpretentious, well priced, and delicious. $7 burger that is well sized, well cooked, and has a spot on bun? Yes please. The blue balls dish? Yeah, I think I will have fried blue cheese and rice balls thank you very much. The carrot side is also a got to have item if you are wondering. The very lightly breaded, super tender, and perfectly seasoned calamari also tore it up. As I said we sampled just about everything and there was nothing I would not happily eat again. The beer and booze menu was fantastic (although cocktails need to be turned over for colder climate) and the service was very friendly, even w/ a raucous crowd. We were also treated to a Masshole serenade of a new song "LB you are a horse's ass!". Over and over and over. It was loud, it was relaxed, it was a great pubbby scene, 1 7/8th thumbs up. It felt like the old Alchemist w/ a little more room to have a drink.

We finished up w/ a drink at The Bench. Nice space but they were already wrapping up when we rolled in at 10:30 (it was Saturday?). There were 2 angry bartenders who both looked like movie villains. After several IPAs I was prepared for my Die Hard moment but it was not needed, probably for the best. Nice beer menu in any event, even if the bartender did not know the beers on it. 1 thumb up pending further revue.

We did a little totally unnecessary post game work and then hit the hay. Next morning there was a coating of snow on the car. Shit. We stopped for more treats at Sweet Simone's. The peanut butter cookie was great, so was the coconut cream tart.

2 thumbs up on the weekend as a whole, it was fun.

Oh, you said "Tapas" joint... yeah, ok, that sounds fun

Get it? Yeah? No? Maybe?

I was reading a "lifestyle" magazine last night whilst on the throne, let's call it fancy food and stuff, they are all the same these days. I found myself fed up w/ the format. These rags used to be about journalists travelling to cool places and trying new foods and wines... now it is all one big vanity project for asshole punks who inherited a bunch of money and don't know what to do with it. So you have a bunch of kind of fat dudes w/ giant beards or waxed mustaches wearing goofy outfits who somehow have smoking hot girlfriends in long flowing dresses. They don't have jobs but do have unbelievable apartments in NYC and summer houses in upstate NY where they pickle nettles. Why do I still read these things? I am a shithead clearly. With that said... I give you my new web magazine, Umlaut, by pretentious people, for pretentious people!

-9/24/15 Exclusive Town on the Hudson. I park my Porsche 365 in the imported Barbados sand driveway and hop on the Ugandan pony up the final 500 yards to the house. I am as struck by the 25,450SF Victorian as I am by the sloping thirty thousand acres leading to the 1 mile of frontage on the river. The property is dapple with afternoon sunbeams and dotted with a maze of fruit trees and wildflowers meticulously maintained by a team of 32 (not upstate new york born) farmers! Out front on the stoop I see my friends Tanner in his custom seersucker suit cut just right at 5 inches too short at the sleeve and leg! He whittles wood next to part time model Uni, Leisure consultant Prairie Moon, and her partner mailbox designer, Zander twirling his waxed 'stache. Our hosts are Dean and Carrie Underfall the IIX. Obviously, they are inside putting the final touches on the lamb that has been braising the last 4 weeks. Dan is a dog catcher and Carrie spends time designing hand made shoelaces for sandals. The kids dance around the Maypole deftly weaving between the dogs and the potbelly pigs never once getting a stain on their Summer Whites!

After a few rounds of Barbu (look it up) and some lawn chess we settle in around the kitchen to taste appetizers of pickled nettles on hand roasted peach slices and whipped butter. The salty sweetness pairs well with the Malvasia Istriana wine and the hand picked cashews toasted w/ Scandinavian sea salt and Japanese white pepper.

Dinner is out on the grounds overseeing the sun approaching the mountains in the west. The Underfalls decide on Galapagos turtles rather than traditional table and chairs giving guests an ever-changing view of the fig trees as they eat the braised lamb surrounded by truffled lobster potatoes in gold leaf and individually shucked snow peas in a light olive oil and child tears dressing. The turtle table attached to their shells helps hold plates ok but makes for a bit of a challenge managing the hand cut crystal glasses full of Assyrtiko from the Greek island of Santorini.

We finish standing on one leg with a rye whiskey locally sourced and distilled on site in the bespoke distillery in the barn while making out own rear view mirror coozie party favors. It has been a grand afternoon on the river... now where is my pony?!

                                                                                                           -Pistachio Gregory

Gettin' weird in Great Barrington

So we took the kids down to my in-laws in the Berkshires for our annual Labor Day extravaganza. Between golf, boating, and kid meltdowns we usually slip out just my lady and I for a night out w/ friends in Great Barrington. We decided on dinner Sunday night at a place we have generally liked, The Prairie Whale. Well, this must have been one of their busiest nights of the year. The place was packed and we felt lucky to get on the list (no resi's for party less than 6) for a scant 45 minute wait. It was hot, real hot. Nearly 90 degrees outside w/ 80+% humidity and no AC inside, everybody was sweating a bit. A lovely couple was finishing up dinner and gave us their 2 seats at the bar while they waited (forever) for their leftovers. So we began our cocktail vigil. After a while a bartender (there were 3) came over and gave us a cocktail menu. I could only see bourbon up on the bar so I asked if they had rye. The hipster clownf*cker behind the bar gave me so much attitude it hurt. Apparently they did. So we ordered our drinks and my buddy and I bellied up to the bar while the ladies cruised outside where it was a little cooler. We drank our solid Manhattans at a leisurely pace and then waited to reload, and waited, and waited, and waited... We got to the point that our conversation broke down as we tried to make eye contact with anyone behind the bar. Mustache guy was still angry I asked if they had rye so no luck there. D-Bag Jones in the sweatsuit only beer-d the cool group of well dressed gay guys and an older group of regulars. The woman behind the bar seemed to just be doing laps to stay in shape. Finally we got Stache back in the mix. DG asked what they had on tap. "Uh, we have Six Point Resin a double IPA, Big Elm IPA, Thunderstruck IPA, a bunch of IPAs, blah blah blah." He was so mad at the amount of IPAs. He also didn't apparently care that we could not see the beer board and were actually interested in what some of those IPA's might have been? We ordered the Resin. I do not care for Stache guy.

Hey, we waited so long for that drink our table was ready! So we sat down and decided to order a bunch of small plates to share. My lady got bad news first, they were out of Rose (rose-ae). They were out of a few dishes and had a few substitutions. No more arugula, only mustard greens. Summer was indeed over I guess. Ok, let's start w/ a dozen oysters and then we ordered some other stuff. They only had 4 oysters. No problem, one each. They only had 3. They found another one and now had 4. Wait... you found a fourth? Found it where exactly? The food itself was good, not great. The cheeseburger was ok. The tagliatelle was pretty good. The one oyster was fine. The one real hit was the fried eggplant w/ burrata... that was delicious. I asked what the beers were again and opted for something a bit lighter, Six Point Sweet Action, a 5% pale ale. Nope, they hit me w/ another double IPA Resin in a pint glass. F* you Jay, you will drink what we tell you!!! Our server at one point also came to us and said she had been cut loose and someone else would be helping us the rest of the way. Cut loose for the night, forever? This was becoming a disturbing trend. We passed on the deserts they probably did not have.

Overall it was a fun night and a fun story but kind of a disappointing meal.

Our final stop was for a nightcap at Allium. This could be its own crazy post but let me just mention we had a conversation w/ "black Shaune" (his words) who came over to explain why he was fighting w/ his 70 year old "uncle" who was a pedophile he had know forever mostly from a youth group and they were just messing around. "Uncle" had stormed out of the bar after telling Shaune to "Get your hands off me!" drawing a rebuke from the bartender who struggled to contain the situation. It was a scene, although I learned that I was not funny and could not tell jokes. Well, Shaune was not wrong. Shortly thereafter he was asked to leave (headed down the street to "the Well"). On our way out I saw Stache heading out for his nightcap. I fought back the urge to kick him in the knee and we called it a night.

Lot of action packed into a quiet Sunday night in an upscale NYC summer escape. Glad we were in the middle of it.