Catching up a bit

I think when you have kids all you think about is your kids. That is what I spend the majority of my time thinking about.  I am on f*d up websites like Diapers.com looking for fleece footy pajamas. I wake up in the night worrying about the million dangerous things around the house that they will obviously put in their moths. Meanwhile they are kind of standing and almost walking but still have no sense of self so they are that much more of a risk to themselves. And a nice thing to do for my special lady and I? A drink and possibly an appetizer out all done w/in 20 minutes before one of the monsters loses their shit and they both go into melt down mode.

What does that have to do w/ you?  Nothing. If I were you I would not care about my kids. They are boring for other people the same way other people's kids are boring to me. This conundrum makes my blog boring. Unless you want to hear about how my son takes enormous stinky shits that somehow manage to get up his back, on his legs, and on his front all at the same time. It looks like a Pollock painting and seem to defy physics?

One little gem is the Netflix show House of Cards. We are way into it. It is dramatic and engrossing. Obviously it is just TV but I always imagine politicians to be that shitty as people. Most politicians I know are pretty bad people. They lie for a living. So if you have Netflix check it out.

It is too bad we lost a few of our better known performers recently. My mother was very surprised that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was a heroin addict. I asked why and she said he was so talented and did not look like one. There you go. To be fair he did look a little pudgy to be a heroin guy. 

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Jay's day off

So President's Day is a great holiday for me. My wife has to work and the nanny also works so I have the day all to myself. The last time I was to have a day to myself I had diarrhea, my kids had diarrhea, the nanny called in sick. So I had to watch 2 sick irritated kids, basically from the toilet. That was not an awesome day. Yesterday everyone felt good so it was all systems go! I began the day by getting the kids fed and changed and getting my wife off to work. Next step, a coffee and muffin at the Shelburne Wine and Coffee shop. So far so good. I then cruised by Lowes to look for some stuff I needed at the house. That was a bust. I stopped at K-Mart and grabbed a couple baby gates. Always depressing. The checkout girl was upset she was asked to stop sweeping and check me out. She tossed my stuff around, gave me some attitude, and missed the discount I was due on one of the baby gates. Whatever, I just wanted out of that shit hole. Next stop, the dump to drop off an old chair. Oh, only open Wed., Thurs., and Sat.? F***. No problem, I can move on. I got a little banking done, picked up a clock for the kitchen, and it was almost time for lunch. Why  not hit up the new food hub, the Noosk?! I spent a little quality time at the bevy center and picked up some cool esoteric brews. I then proceeded to the Mule Bar. Closed until 3PM. WTF! Misery Loves Company. Just plain closed. WTF?!?! Sneakers... huge wait. Dammit! Fine, Our House it is. I picked a seat at the bar and prepared for ok food and a crappy beer selection. The place was packed. There was one woman acting as bartender, and the only waitress while some other schlub followed her around busing tables. You have got to be shitting me. The problem w/ the Noosk is if you are in a situation like this you are kind of stuck. 10 minutes later I got a beer. This was not looking good. Another 8 minutes later I received a menu. Meanwhile several groups got up and left, others complained, some were forgotten, the waitress overflowed the coffee in the tiny kitchen. One fat asshole decided to chew into the waitress for giving away her table even though she came late for her party and had a prime seat at the bar. She was a real tool. Not really the waitress's fault the place was under staffed. I had a so so Reuben. The whole thing was kind of a bust. They did comp me a beer.

I then went to enjoy a movie. Well, "enjoy" may be a strong term. There is nothing but giant piles of steamy shit at the theater right now. I chose the least steamy, Robocop. They should have renamed it Preachy-Writer/Director. It was not good and paled in comparison to the original. 1 thumb down.

Well, when I got home I put up the child gates (my daughter's new favorite game is to sneak to the stairs and crawl up them awkwardly). Kids were in a pretty good mood and I had a nice dinner and relaxing evening w/ my wife. So much for the Day of Jay!

BTW, thanks the Das Wulfenstein for an introduction to my new favorite rapper.