In death as in life...

Yup, the Michael Jackson story probably can't get much weirder... so his dad is not in the will but that will is from 2002 and written by a lawyer he fired, then rehired, and his kids are not his, nor the mother's but maybe they are the seed of the dermatologist (who is quite an artist), and they have not been legally adopted, but are legally in custody of the grandmother because the mother who is not the real mother does not want them... hold on, catching my breath... ok, so at death Michael was bald, emaciated, on drugs, but appeared a few days earlier, singing, dancing, performing, in good shape (for a plastic person). He further never had plastic surgery even though "everyone" in Hollywood has, except once, wait twice, but just the nose... it was all puberty... you know the regular puberty that turns people a totally different skin color/facial structure/sex. This would be an epic movie, like 12 hours right?!

Speaking of amazing artists...
http://www.aaronflinn.com/

smirking, holding back laugh, snarfing, cracking up...

What a week...

Ed McMahon was pretty old. Farah Fawcett? Ok, chalk that one up to bad luck. She had been sick for awhile and sometimes these sad things happen. Michael Jackson? I guess it was not a "shock" per ce but wow, the timing was a surprise. Billy Mays? I guess that also was not a shock because he looked like he was in a constant state of hypertension but I just started watching that show "Pitchmen", and he looked pretty healthy? The Michael Jackson thing has been crazy. I cannot remember a death having this kind of polarizing effect. Some people remember Jackson the icon and the statesman. Others remember him as a pederast and started joking about him the moment the body turned cold. Me? I don't know him and don't know if he was a bad guy or just really weird. I tend to think the former but who knows. I feel bad for his kids. I guess at the end of the day he was still a huge force in music and I remember the excitement I had when Thriller came out (I was 8). The video was a stay home event, of course back then so was every space shuttle launch. I still think he was a talented guy and his songs are pretty good if you are into the whole pop thing. I also would never allow a kid alone w/ him. I have told a few tasteless jokes already so no more here, it is just too bad for these people's families.

Bernie Madoff just got 150yrs. Remember that post about how rich people always get away w/ stuff unless they are getting hit by the govt.? Well, this is a case in point... The MAN wanted retribution and Madoff just felt the pain.

I am a little off today... my buddy had his bachelor party this past weekend and, well, let's just say old Jaybird was helping him celebrate! Well done on the boot and rally JB, that's strong.

Want to see what I think will be the best new show on TV?

http://www.nypost.com/seven/06292009/tv/get_to_the_bottom_176653.htm

Yeah, nothing demeaning there...

Pork Chop Sandwiches!!!!!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L1BDM1oBRJ8

It's A Girl For The Pumas!!!!!

A little emotional right now, but please put your hands together and welcome to this world Julia Pearl Puma!!!!!!!!!! Tons of love my friends

Jay About Beantown

This past weekend my special lady and I decided to get out of Dodge and visit some of my old haunts in Boston. It was a quick weekend trip for just the two of us but it was very nice. Saturday ended up being a nice day and we were able to stroll around and do so browsing, some shopping, some eating. We had a nice late lunch at Abe n' Louie's on Boylston Street. We had a nice table outside to do some people watching. First off the bread basket is pretty serious w/ 2 kinds of flatbread and a variety of sourdough, wheat, and other breads. My lady had a very well seasoned Bloody Mary, I had a very well presented dry martini (they kept the excess in a chilled container on ice). For lunch LadyBird had a nice and tasty Caesar's salad, and I had a great lobster club sandwich. Good lobster, good bread, and not too heavy on the mayo. Huge servings, very solid service, a little pricey... 1 7/8th thumbs up. I mean, seriously... one of the 5 hostesses walked me to the men's room. You can imagine what happened next... I peed. Side note in Back Bay, check out the store "47" on Newbury. It has really cool "vintage" sports apparel.

After a bit more wandering/shopping we walked through the park in Back Bay and then made our way over the Beacon Hill. There are some crazy preppy stores up in that area. I really wanted some pink shorts w/ martini glasses on them but they were like $110 or something ridiculous. We hit up one great store which unfortunately I forget the name but this woman had an amazing collection of old maps, and photos, and prints. Really cool place. We then had a drink @ Seven's. Great vibe, great energy, solid beers, good service... do not touch the food unless you have been starving for 14 days. It looked gross and is all cooked in a microwave. Cool place though.

Dinner was a little slice of Indian love @ Kashmir on Newbury Street. We had veggie samosas, a spinach and goat cheese dish and a lamb dish w/ some plain na'an. I won't try to remember the names or all of the ingredients, just know this... the place is very very good. The food is fresh and not greasy and the spices are delicate and fragrant. Service is a little lacking but the presentation is good and the price is very fair. 2 thumbs up. We stayed at the Charlesmark Hotel on Boylston. Great location, reasonable price, tiny rooms (but clean), and awful continental breakfast. Overall 1 thumb sideways. It is perfectly fine for a quick excursion but not for a lengthy stay.

Sunday we went to the Institute of Contemporary Art at the Seaport and checked out the Shepard Fairey exhibit http://www.icaboston.org/ It was really amazing. I am a huge fan and think if you have the time it is really worth a look. The rest of the museum was fine, not great. Cool building and location over the harbor though. We finished our trip w/ a North End lunch @ Strega. Very friendly, very Italian. Big portions, good food. We shared a salad and a pasts dish w/ eggplant, mozzarella, and sun dried tomatoes. It was great. 1 3/4 thumbs up. It was really quite good. Plus you can watch mobster movies on one of the 7 flat screen TVs they are rocking. Overall 2 thumbs up for our trip, it was fun and very relaxing.

R.I.P. Ed McMahon

One of the great sidekicks who became an icon himself. Always willing to poke a little fun at himself and wore those great changing tint sunglasses.

On another note. A story came out today concerning a guy who will get 3 years in prison for stealing Lance Armstrong's bike. This is a great illustration of the inequities inherent in our legal system. This guy will go to prison for stealing a bike. Chris Brown beat up his girlfriend and will not spend a day in prison. Donte Stallworth got drunk and KILLED a guy and he will only get 26 days behind bars. Money, fame, and the lawyers money buys provide the difference between days and years in prison. So if you are poor, do not get in trouble, don't even look at a cop sideways. If you are rich like Jayson Williams, feel free to shoot your limo driver, then beat a guy up... you are above the law my friend! One exception is rich/crooked CEOs. The one victim who will not bend for anyone is the government. Do them wrong and you will get f*d no matter how much money you have. Just sayin'.

http://sports.espn.go.com/oly/cycling/news/story?id=4280331

Burlington Politics?

Yup... thx to DS for the pic.

Had burger and wings at RJs last night. I would say they have the best wings in town and the burger is right up there. Doesn't hurt that they hire waitresses that look kind of good after 6 beers. Did I just type that? Prank caller, prank caller!!!

Finished the evening w/ a beer @ Esox. I might have even just spelled that incorrectly but who cares. We rolled in on the advice of a co-worker who is no longer my friend. Of course we were the only ones under 50 (or at least they looked 50+) or 12 drinks deep. One handsome gentleman looked like a cross between watermelon smashing Gallagher and the evil clown from the Stephen King Book IT. Another guy was rocking a cocktail of some sort sipped through a straw made easy due to the missing front teeth. The ladies? Something special my friends, greasy hair, dumpy bodies, the works! One other drunk guy kept professing his love for the bartender who was also a piece of work. She enjoyed bending over my buddy K-dog while we laughed and he tried to look away in horror. She also insisted we buy pitchers because they were cheaper. Not sure how a pitcher was cheaper than 1 beer but I don't want to fight the mathematical skills of that crowd! The smell? Intoxicating! Seriously, I was getting light headed and started hallucinating a bit from the body odor/stale beer smell. That bar is gross. 2 cans of Golden Anniversary up.

From Stoners to... Thousandaires?

Got this link from good friend Madam Puma and the video is one of the best things I have seen in awhile. You may recall this game from the days back in college when you sat around the dorm and... watched your friends get stoned and flip a light around (for shame!). Well, now for $9.95 you can sit around your living room sober and play the same game w/ your kids! Even better, you can pretend to be a ninja while you are flipping a bean bag around the room... just like Crazy Ivan! You know, that, or you could just buy a lighter at the gas station for 99 cents and experience the same "thrill". Either way. SHAZAM!!!!!


https://getmyachi.com/

Whirlwind weekend!

Started off the weekend on Thurs. w/ a little jazz at the Red Square... at least I am pretty sure that is what they were playing, I mean, it was JazzFest after all? Friday was a nice quiet dinner at the house with my special lady. Then we watched the movie Doubt. First off, I will admit I fell asleep for about 10 crucial minutes in the middle of the movie. I have had a bad habit of falling asleep during the better movies we have seen lately, go figure. Anywho, the movie was pretty good. The "twists and turns" are somewhat predictable but the acting really was quite good. Phillip Seymore Hoffman (don't care if I spelled it wrong) was good and Meryl Streep plays a great crusty old nun. 1 1/2 thumbs up, good date movie. You know, not like Bloodsport date movie good but still...

Saturday we clean up around the house which was a lot more fun than hiking or golf. The evening was fun though as the two of us ventured to Shelburne Farms for dinner. It is pricey but you really are paying for the setting (an old Vanderbilt estate), the service (professional, courteous), and the atmosphere (haughty... but not too haughty) as much as for the food. This is the second time I have had dinner here and this meal was much better than my first. I started w/ a Cavendish Quail that was cooked very well and had a nice walnut and brie spoon pudding. I really liked it and actually stopped talking to my wife for 10 minutes. She had a beet salad that was good but I am not sure how good because I was busy! My entree was a little bit of a drag, the herbed goat cheese ravioli was a little al dente and a little cold. The flavor of the dish all in was solid but they needed to serve it right away. The fava bean ragu helped rescue the dish from thumbs down territory. My lady rocked an ultra rich tilapia that had a wonderful crust that tasted as if the fish had been fried for a bit in bacon grease. She said the mussels were good, the clams were too big and looked gross. The money shot was the lobster cake under the fish. Holy crap that was good. As rich as any food I have eaten lately but we were both fans. Oh yeah, had a really nice Burgundy during dinner. To finish off the meal we shared a Brown sugar cake with ginger ice cream and blueberry compote. Delicious! I wish the cake had been warm but it is a small complaint. Overall I thought the experience was a solid 1 3/4 thumbs up.

Sunday we went to a baby naming ceremony in the morning which was very nice. I rolled out and played a pretty bad round of golf. Ever had to duck your own shot that ends up 15 feet behind you? Uh, yeah, neither have I. Sunday night we rocked dinned club w/ some friends which was really fun. I must be getting old and sucky because I followed my bad golf w/ a bocce ass whupping and then a ping pong beat down. I thought about challenging my friends to a fight after that thinking I was due, but decided I might be in line for a sweep. Dinner itself was excellent. LBsquared really made it happen w/ sauces, steak, philo (not easy) wrapped shrimp goodness, asparagus, seasoned potatoes, and then just to stick the fork in me... a many layer ice cream cake. Again I stopped conversing and chowed! 2 thumbs way up for effort and execution.

Not for nothing but my favorite b-ball team the Lakers won the title which made me pretty happy. I don't follow them like the Red Sox but they are a second banana. Very weird team though. When they won the only person who seemed genuinely happy was Kobe-Beef and he looked like he was forcing it. The rest of the team looked relieved/indifferent. That's Los Angeles for you I guess. The subdued celebration was just very jarring, especially compared to the Celtics the previous year, even the Phillies winning the World Series last year had 100 times the emotion. Oh well, can't make people care if they just don't. I give the series 1 thumb sideways. Frankly, if you thought the Magic ever had a chance you don't watch much basketball. A team that chokes free throws and lives and dies by the 3-pointer is doomed to fail. The one game they won was what, by 4 points, and they shot 65% from the floor? It's called an anomaly, anomaly... kind of like girls turning away my advances in college!!

Uhhhhh...

When Did Ol' General Qaddafi become the King of Pop? I always knew that song "Billie Jean" was really about Yasser Arafat!

I'm Kind of a Big Deal

Went out to a business lunch @ Sweetwaters today. Had an ok burger w/ bacon, swiss and mushrooms. Waitress messed up my fries order and I got the regular which were gross versus the sweet potato which looked great. On a side note, I not only dropped bacon on my lap I also sprayed ketchup all over myself... Boo-yeah!!! If you have a chance you have to get to Church Street for Jazz Fest (going on now). In addition to the usual teenage tattooed parents screaming obscenities at each other, the homeless drug addict smoking 2 cigarettes at the same time, wacky shirtless guy w/ the pipe or wacky shirtless guy w/ the walking stick... we now have "Jazz X10" butchering Hey Jude in front of Town Hall. These junior high kids are absolutely killing it!! Of course Leunig's had a trio that seemed to feature a drummer who was off the beat and looked like he was trying to take a shit. So that was fun. Well, short post today, I need to ditch my shirt and go wander around yelling random stuff at strangers!

You Really Never Want

To be found dead w/ a cord around your neck, hands, and wiener. I feel sorry for David Carradine's family but oh boy... that is a bad way to go one way or the other.

Speaking of having a cord around your neck and genitals, I accompanied my wife to her 10yr college reunion this weekend. HAHA, just kidding, it was not that bad. In fact, the crowd was better than the one at my 10 yr. That's right, I married a younger woman. I know what's up! The food at Middlebury was not good and the budget cutbacks were definitely in effect. It really is a nice campus though and all things being equal they did a pretty ok job with the event. The after party was the best. I was sober due to a driving commitment and not to watch folks get drunk and then start talking nonsense. One friend was blatantly making shit up which was really fun.

The other highlight of the weekend was the first company softball scrimmage I attended. Our team is defensively challenged. Fortunately we don't really hit that well either! I certainly am not throwing stones from my glass house. I dropped one fly ball (despite the rain I think the sun got in my eyes), and made the outfield a Manny Ramirez like adventure. Should be a fun year. We do need to improve our Miller Light supply chain though!

One last tidbit was the continuing love/hate relationship we have w/ Burlington sushi. this week it was clearly hate as Sakura made my special lady feel ill. Didn't do me any favors either. Anecdotally, my buddy says we didn't miss anything at the Rusty Scuffer. On a high note, it was packed on Church Street for JazzFest. Seriously, it was a mob scene like I have not seen in awhile. Very positive for business in the area. We need a pickup in action. Well, guess I will leave it a that, I need to hop. Looking for my second yellow card in 2 games!!! Wish me luck.

I have an eery feeling...

So there will be a new laptop that runs entirely off the Google "Android" operating system. That is the same Google that maps the crack of your ass from space or random dudes driving around your town taking pictures of your house... In other news, Nintendo unveils "Wii Fit Plus", allowing people to never go outside, for ANYTHING. I am calling it now, Google will become self aware w/in the next 2 years, and having rented the Terminator movies from itself will launch a pre-emptive attack on humans! Of course, having seen Wall-E we are way ahead and have taken the Nintendo WiiPods to space where we live as plasma loosely attached to a mushy brain. Just sayin'.

Had a braised beef panini from Mirabelle's today. It was AWESOME. The meat was tender and flavorful, the peppers and onions were cooked just right and the bread was buttery, and crunchy. Plus it came w/ a nice fresh side salad. 2 thumbs up, one of the better lunches I have had recently.

My special lady and I rented Vicky Cristina Barcelona this weekend. Pretty typical Woody Allen movie in that it was shot well, well written, and very uncomfortable. It is like watching a train wreck from a mile away. Pretty entertaining though and I thought it was pretty well acted and visually stunning. 1 1/4 thumbs up.

S&P f*d me again this week... 2 thumbs way down.

We had a solid gastro-weekend at the BirdHouse. Local beef, local greens, local beer. My wife is good, she has really embraced the food culture of VT and is rocking simple but elegant dishes. 2 thumbs up. I think more than the organic kick I am a huge fan of going local and buying non-processed foods from the local farmers, butchers, etc... Next step for old Jaybird is a Prius I guess... HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!! Come on, I am a localvore not a douchebag!

Oh yeah, watched the rest of Role Models, uh, don't waste your time... seriously.

First soccer game of the year, yup got my first yellow card! What can I say, I am a bad ass, capital B capital A!!!!!

Congrats DT on promo, well deserved.